The Miracle of Death

I was recently at a Biznik meeting in N. Seattle and started a conversation with someone who's writing about his son who died awhile ago. This conversation made me think of one of the most profound books I've ever read about death, grief, and the afterlife. It's called The Miracle of Death, by Betty J. Kovacs, Ph.D. Betty lost her mother, then her only son, then her husband, all in a matter of a few years. She could have been devastated and lost all reason for living. Instead, she allowed it to open her up to the true meaning of life. She had always had powerful dreams, and after her losses, her dreams became more and more telling. She eventually opened up to be able to communicate with her son and husband on the other side.

Dr. Kovacs is now teaching what she learned from her experiences with death and grief to others through The Kamlak Center. She is one courageous woman who is helping to show us the way through these transformational times we're living through.

I have just recently interviewed with Darren Main, a fellow author through Findhorn Press. It was a very good interview, as Darren has done his homework in the area of death & dying. He understands the anamoly of death (and grief) in our culture. I invite you to listen to our conversation here.

May we each be open to exploring the deaths and griefs that come into our lives such that we can ride the waves of transformation that are knocking on our doors on a fairly frequent and intense basis these days! Dancing Heart~~~

We're All in this Hospice Experience Together!

I have said in the past that we're all going through a kind of "hospice experience" in our lives these days. In the last few weeks, as the powerful money institutions of the world are beginning to crumble, I'm sensing even more that this is a time for profound change on our planet. We are beginning to realize, and wake up to our senses, that we cannot base our lives on the material aspects of life. If we are "spiritual beings having a human experience," then it's the spiritual that we can truly trust and make our foundation.

This past weekend I had the good fortune to work with an amazing healer and hypno-therapist named Yvonne Oswald. She is a remarkable woman who embodies what she teaches. Her book is called Every Word Has Power, and it is one of the most practical and profound books I've ever read to help me change my way of thinking and being. As I learn from Yvonne and read and practice what she shares in her book, I'm literally shifting myself from negative thought patterns to positive ones. And it is creating a difference in my life! I'm a happier person as I tune into the true essence of who I really am, and as I love myself, forgive myself, and am more gentle and nourishing to myself.

One related exercise that I've learned and am practicing is to spend time telling myself how much I love myself. Besides the phrase "I love you, Dancing Heart (you can substitute your name here)," I'm learning that there are three other simple phrases we can use to honor ourselves: "I'm so sorry," "I forgive you," and "Thank you." These are phrases that as children, we yearned to hear more. However, due to the reality on the planet, most of us never got to hear these powerful, loving phrases as much as we needed. This is why we need to let ourselves hear these words now, as adults who can also honor the Inner Child within.

In these times of deep change, I invite you to find new ways to honor and love yourself, however those opportunities may come to you. By the way, I would invite you to visit Yvonne's website, too. Abundance, Joyful Blessings! Dancing Heart~~~

P.S. Don't forget: I offer wonderful Soul Baskets for anyone going through a time of transition in their lives, at my website, www.soulbaskets.com!

How can we reach the doctors?

I recently stumbled across some fax numbers for nursing directors across the country. One of the numbers I called turned out to be for a clinic, so the receptionist at the other end of the line kindly gave me the phone number for the local hospital. I was able to reach a nurse through the hospital operator. After briefly mentioning to her the title and some information about my book, she responded: "So have you found a way to reach the doctors?"

What an insightful question... This one nurse's words have been ringing in my ears. It seems that the key to creating space for death in our hospitals is to get through to the doctors. A medical social worker who works at a cancer center commented that doctors can hear you better individually more than they can in a group setting. And perhaps especially when a doctor is moving through his or her own personal loss or transition, they are more likely to appreciate the need to "make space" for grief and death -- not only in their lives, but in hospitals as well.

One of the most hopeful aspects in this regard is the possibility that medical schools and younger doctors are changing, recognizing the need to have a different kind of relationship with death. I've heard that today there is more education around palliative care and hospice in medical schools compared to what there used to be. Along these lines, I've discovered a wonderful book by a young surgeon named Pauline W. Chen. Her book is called FINAL EXAM: A Surgeon's Reflections on Mortality.

May we all become more aware of how we push death (and grief) aside in our lives. May we create new ways to incorporate it more fully into our lives by honoring it making a new space for it. And when the opportunity arises, I encourage you to have conversations around this topic with your physicians, and healers of all kinds, for that matter!

Deep Blessings of Peace and Hope, Dancing Heart~~~

Feeling Our Feelings, Holding Deep Compassion

Recently, I came across these sentences from a very fine book called The Tibetan Book of Living and Dying, by Sogyal Rinpoche. They are sentences that remind us how important our feelings are:

Don't waste the love and grief it arouses; the moment you feel compassion welling up in you, don't brush it aside, don't shrug it off and try quickly to return to 'normal', don't be afraid of the feeling or embarrassed by it, allow yourself to be distracted from it or let it run aground in apathy. Be vulnerable; use that quick, bright up rush of compassion; focus on it, go deep into your heart and meditate on it, develop it, enhance and deepen it. By doing this you will realize how blind you have been to suffering.

These words remind me of a counselor who used to challenge me, when my heart was moved and the tears would well up in my eyes, to "Stay with what you're feeling." lt was usually a challenge to do so, because my tendency is to go back to my brain, go back to analyzing and being where I'm comfortable (in my head), where I can "be in control," I suppose. However, whenever I could and did stay with the feelings, there was a sense of release and healing that would come.

This weekend I'm involved with a Landmark Forum, a few intense days I've set apart for myself to examine some of the things that "I don't know that I don't know" -- the unconscious, if you will -- with a community of courageous people. Yesterday, our fearless leader shared a very personal story and was moved to tears. He shared his tears and his being moved openly with us. Other men in the group also shared their tears. It was very powerful and moving to experience especially these men I did not know share their intimate feelings so freely and honestly.

It always feels powerful and important to me to experience people allowing their feelings to be present and real. Too often in our society we are trained to hold our feelings inside, not to share what we're really feeling. Somehow we've made it okay to think, but not so okay to feel.

I encourage you to notice and BE with your feelings in these days of great change and transformation. They will be your guide into the future. Trust your feelings... they can guide you to the Deep Compassion that resides within you. They may even open doors that you never even knew existed!

Blessings on the Journey, Dancing Heart~~~

The Healing Power of Essential Oils

Recently, I was reminded of the power of essential oils, especially to help us through transitions, while reading something that I came across through a piece I'd received through a friend: "One evening, I was burning essential oil in my bathroom. Somewhere between lighting the candle and smelling the oil, I had a vision. It was just a flash, but I saw a death ceremony from another time. I didn't get any details on the people at the ceremony, but I did pick up on their determined knowledge to send the smell of the oils, with the recently deceased, up to the heavens."

The fact is, these healing oils have been around for a very long time and have been used for many purposes, including ceremonial and at the end of life. Frankincense has been considered a most healing oil and a oil to help us connect with Spirit since the ancient of days. There is no mistake that Jesus received this oil that was considered more valuable than gold from the three wise men at the time of his birth. Myrrh is also a powerfully healing oil, associated particularly with the skin; here again, there's no mistake that Jesus was gifted this oil at the time of his birth, a reminder that it would be needed at the time of his burial. Many of the scriptural oils such as Cedarwood, Spikenard -- the oil Mary Magdalene used to anoint Jesus, Myrtle, Hyssop, Sandalwood, and Rose of Sharon are very helpful oils to use when one is ill, needing refreshment, or getting ready to depart this world. I highly recommend that you go to the Essential Oil Page on my website to see more about on the protocols for a variety of oils. Then, you may go to the Young Living website to order some of the oils, using my distributor #: 705841. Or contact me, and I can help you sign up with Young Living over the phone.

If you would like to read about one of the most powerful and mystical experiences I had surrounding a death using the oils, you may go to pp. 178 - 180 of the 2nd edition of my book. The whole section on Aromatherapy shares some important information on the history of the oils and their use. Another idea would be to go to my other Soul Baskets website and purchase a Soul Basket that has some of these wonderful oils included in them. If you call me directly at (888) 409-1678, I can offer you a variety of the oils separately, too. (Usually, they are $10 per bottle, and I'm now offering some new blends like Release and Thieves as well.)

Stay Beautiful, and Keep Shining! Dancing Heart~~~

Visit to an Amazing Hospital in Stockton, CA

This past week I was invited to attend a kick-off for a "No One Dies Alone" Hospice Volunteer Program at the Community Hospice in Modesto, CA. It was a beautiful event and I was honored to be a part of it. It reminded me of how volunteers are the true heart of hospice. They are such dedicated and loving, spiritually motivated souls who do this work. It is always inspiring to be among them -- and all hospice workers, for that matter.

On my way home to Seattle, I also had the honor to speak informally with a group involved with palliative care at the St. Joseph's Medical Center in Stockton, CA. I was greatly impressed by this group, especially because of how they seem to be promoting the body-mind-spirit connection, not only among their cancer patients, but also among their entire staff at the hospital.

I heard that very recently, during the course of a day, they had 155 staff members receive hands-on Reiki treatments from practitioners who made themselves available to them. Hospital staff being cared for in this way is something I'd not heard of before. This is truly a sign of our times! We are not only learning about, but also practicing new ways to care for the caregiver in ways that help us connect the body, mind, and spirit. This is most encouraging and enlightening to me. Is there anything like this going on in your corner of the world? If so, I'd love to hear about it.

By the way, if you'd like to know more about Reiki, a form of "laying on of hands" healing using light and energy that originated in Japan, you can go to pp. 206 - 207 in my book, THE LAST ADVENTURE OF LIFE (2nd ed.). Or, you could visit this website for more information.

Deep Blessings of Hope and Healing, Dancing Heart~~~

Listening to Silence

I wanted to share this poem that I came across by James Dillet Freeman before I head for Modesto, CA today. I'll be sharing with a hospice volunteer group that's starting up a "No One Dies Alone" program -- a wonderful way to make sure that every single person has support at the very end of their lives! Here's the poem:

There is a music just in being still,
A sound of silence that you only hear
When you are in attunement with God's will
And listen in your soul, not with your ear.
Then comes a blessedness that is not sound
Or soundlessness, and you become aware
Of the beauty that is always all around
Us and the truth that is forever everywhere.

How are you honoring the Silence in your life?!?

Also, I've just begun preparing some U-tubes to go on my website. I hope to have some of them up within the month. Have a blessed day filled with Gratitude and Deep Blessings, Dancing Heart~~~